(If you haven’t read the beginning of the Crayola Virus “saga”, you’ll find it here Crayola Virus)
Since it’s just you and me here, I can tell you – due to my extensive knowledge of the Crayola Virus, I was contacted by the Secret Health And Medical Service (SHAMS) for a special assignment.
I am currently undercover as a patient in a large hospital in one of our finer IL cities to learn, if I can, what is really wrong with the three patients who are claiming to have the Crayola Virus. As you know, there is no such disease. Is there something else wrong that “they” are hiding from us? Are they up to something else altogether?
Per my mission, I went to the hospital in our hometown complaining of chest and back pains and found a way to elevate my BP (that’s code for blood pressure). I’m afraid I overdid that a little – it got kind of high. Anyway, naturally, they couldn’t find any real reason for the symptoms I presented (see, I worked that term in again!), so they sent me by ambulance to the hospital where the three suspicious cases are being “treated.”
I will have to keep my cover in play, so I will be having an EKG, an ECHO, a CT, an R-E-S-P-E CT, and maybe an RSVP. I really didn’t pay much attention. Meanwhile, I will try to slip around to patients 0,1, and 2 and try to find out what thay are up to. It may have something to do with toilet paper! I will keep you posted. Shhhh!
I snuck out of my room last night and found they had been keeping the three Crayola “patients” just a couple of doors down from me. Two men in black suits were guarding the doorway. I could see inside and the room had three empty beds. No one in the room. I did not know at the time that the men worked for the World Health Organization (WHO) nor did I know the names of the patients. Later this morning I got a nurse to tell me confidentially the patients were Gene Rowdey, Sam “Dizzy” Dean (like the famous baseball player), and Noah Count.
As I looked past the “suits” into the room, one told me to move along. I asked if he was in charge of the patients. He said, “WHO is.”
“That’s what I’m asking you,” I said.
“I told you.”
“You told me who’s in charge?”
“That’s correct,” he said.
I said, “I’m confused,” and changed the subject. “What were you sent here to do?”
“Did you get rowdy?”
“I’m just two doors down and I didn’t hear anything.”
“We were quiet.”
“You said you got rowdy.”
“You can’t get rowdy and be quiet.”
I said, “I’m getting dizzy.”
“You can’t – we already did.”
“You got dizzy, too?”
“You got dizzy when you got rowdy?”
“Yes. At the same time,” he said.
“Well, THAT makes sense. But you said you were quiet.”
Moving on, I said, “There were three patients here, right?”
“Yes. We sent one home.”
“Could you tell me his name?”
“He was Noah Count.”
“But he still has a name.”
“Of course he does.”
“And you sent him home?”
“He tested negative for any virus. And he was Noah Count.”
“It was okay to let him go, but you shouldn’t pass judgment on his character. Did he get rowdy?”
“No. We did.”
“But you got rowdy quietly?”
“Of course. And we got Dizzy.”
“And sent one of the patients home.”
“Yes. That one was Noah Count.”
“You’re probably right. So where are the other two patients?”
“They were taken to our main office.”
“I’m going back to my room,” I said.
“That’s a good idea, sir.”
I am still not quite sure what happened. Maybe it’s because they keep taking blood from me. ECHO stress test yet to come. After last night’s ordeal with WHOever, this should be a piece of cake!
(Since learning that the Crayola Virus in under control, I turned my attention to learning about the Coronavirus! Check it out: Closed Caption Confusion )
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